D’oh!Mestic

Last year it was socks and this year it’s hats.

Oh, I see how it is — the plant decided to wait until we were six weeks out from the first frost to start spitting out more baby tomatoes. I get it, I get it.
It’s mocking me.

ME GRIMLOCK NO BOZO! ME GRIMLOCK KING!

TODAY ME GRIMLOCK MAKE CAKE! SEE! CAKE!
ME GRIMLOCK AND DINOASSISTANTS GRIMLOCK AND GRIMLOCK MAKE GRIMLOCK CAKE! NOM CAKE NOM!

ME GRIMLOCK CAKE — Yellow and chocolate layered cake with chocolate cream cheese frosting
Yellow Cake
2 cups flour
2 tsp baking powder
2.5 cups sugar
0.5 cup butter
3 eggs
1 tbs vanilla
0.5 tsp lemon extract
.75 milk
Butter [...]

I’m moving shifts next weekend — for the first time in my dozen years of working full-time, I will work the standard 9 to 6 day. Granted, it’s not quite market hours and it’s not quite material from a Dolly Parton song, but, y’know, what more can you ask for in the early 21st century [...]

So, I yelled at some kids to get off my lawn. Like, for serious. “Hey, you! Get off my property,” for realsies.
There were a group of girls — sullen adolescent females — who gave me the blank look of “you can’t make me do anything,” but they eventually moved all of six feet down [...]

See that hat? Fair isle skulls. My own design, sort of. I knocked it out last weekend, and I was sad that I wouldn’t have the opportunity to wear it for six months — though there might have been a moment when I schemed to sneak into the ice cream freezer at the supermarket.
And then, [...]

I got cocky.
On Friday morning, I made cupcakes. Red velvet, cream cheese frosting, run-of-the-mill cupcakes. This morning, I made lemon bars. Stupid, simple lemon bars.
And somewhere between the cupcakes and the lemon bars, a copy of this month’s Martha Stewart Living snaked its way into the house and I just happened to fall in love [...]

Sometime last week, right when I was emerging from the sadness of losing Buttercup, I got this idea in my head to do an Etsy run in the mid-summer. I don’t know — I’m writing it off as that period of lunacy that crops up after any run-of-the-mill heartbreak. Some people don’t eat. Some people [...]

I’m semi-drunk on a Tuesday night, listening to Lucy on XM. U2 crooned about the last night on earth and now Gwen’s singing about being just a girl. Buttercup, a sweet little soul, died in The Capt’n’s arms this morning and I have no coping mechanism beyond getting looped on an undistinguished pinot from Sanford [...]